Rebound Relationships How To Improve The Chances Of Success

People often say rebound relationships don’t work. I don’t agree as there are plenty of happy couples out there who met shortly after breaking up with someone else.

So what defines a rebound relationship? Usually it is where someone starts going out with another person very soon after leaving or being left by a former lover. If you have met somebody who seems to tick all the boxes you were looking for in a partner, I certainly would not dump them.  Yes, they could dump you, but so could anyone new that you meet; so why worry about it. You could just as easily be the person they have been looking for.

Relationships break down for all sorts of reasons. It is actually more common for two people to grow apart rather than separate due to an affair or similar reason. If your current partner split from his/her ex, they did it for a reason. If they had been together for a long time, they probably grew apart. Or they may have realised that once the initial attraction had worn off, they were not compatible enough to sustain a long term relationship.

If your new lover has just recently rejoined the single scene, you do need to be a little careful. But you would proceed slowly when dating any new person; wouldn’t you?  Try to find out why they split with their partner, but for heaven’s sake, don’t make them feel like they are being interrogated. Men in particular are very slow to speak about their feelings. If he doesn’t want to talk about it, do not jump to the conclusion that he doesn’t like you or find you attractive. 

I would also advise against asking to see a picture of the former partner. You do not want to start comparing yourself to them and it is difficult not to do this when you know what they look like. If you are part of the same social circle, it could be even harder not to draw comparisons. If you don’t do it yourself, you may find some of your mutual friends do. Try to discourage/ignore these conversations as they are unhelpful. Nobody knows what  happened between a couple other than those two people.
 
If you are the one on the rebound you need to be sure of your motivation for getting involved. Are you looking for a short fling or a long term love affair?  Whatever you do, don’t get involved with another man to make your ex jealous or for revenge. It rarely works and it isn’t fair to play with the new persons emotions.
You may find, just like I did, that your rebound relationship never ends and in fact turns into the love affair of the century. We all need some more fun in our life so try to enjoy yourself with your new partner and see where it leads.  Whoever says you should avoid rebound relationships is missing out on a whole lot of fun.
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Here Are A Few Thoughts On How To Improve Self Esteem

By Eve Francis

Lets face it, we are all caught up in the meat market mentality that "you can never make another first impression"; or "clothes make the man"; statements like these bely the fact that we are all intensely aware of how we come across to everyone else out there that crosses our path, and our self esteem or lack of it, is built on this awareness and the reactions we get from other people.

If you were constantly told you were a failure, or were ugly, or stupid; after time, your self esteem would be at such a low level that you felt negatively about everything and then others would perceive that and begin to treat you in the same way, or shy away from being in contact with you at all. And the more that feeling is solidified in your inner core and thoughts, the more it becomes a part of your persona and affects everything you do. Positive self esteem is simply feeling good about yourself and your lot in life, and having that feeling constantly bolstered by the folks around you.

There are zillions of books in print molding away on bookshelves all over the world, telling us the ins and outs of how to improve our self esteem, but in reality all we need to know us the Golden Rule, and practice it. Good self esteem comes from feeling positively about your station in life and interacting with others in a positive way so they in turn feel the same about you. A negative self esteem is when you feel you have no purpose in life, and disdain the life you are living----quite often this feeling is accompanied by depression and listlessness, and who wants to spend much time around someone feeling like that.

The Golden Rule is a great motivator for everyone to remember, because it embodies a large factor in what makes people tick in their interactions with each other. If you treat others as you would want them to treat you; with respect, understanding, genuine interest in what they had to say and their ideas; then they will usually respond in kind with you and as a result you feel very positively about yourself in that response and your self esteem is bolstered. People who are driven, know what they want out of life and go after it, and in the course of their lives treat others fairly; are those that others want to be associated with because they exude success.

Getting hung up on how people look and first impressions making decisions for you is a stumbling block that a lot of people suffer from; and getting past this hurdle is critical for those who want to learn how to improve their self esteem. If your core values are in place, you know what is right and wrong, and you treat others fairly in your dealings with them, then you will see a very positive response from them in what you have to say and as a result, your inner feelings toward yourself will expand in a positive manner and so will your self esteem. If we could all be more human in our dealings with each other and less negative, we would all possess good self images and the world would be a vastly different place.

How to improve self esteem is a lesson that we are learning almost all of our lives on this planet. We start out as a blank slate as far as feelings about ourselves, and as we grow and interact with others, we begin to develop an image of ourselves as others react to us and whether or not they want to be around us; and this gradual self awareness of the actions of others begins to define how we feel about ourselves in a positive or negative way----in other words, our self esteem.

Success in life is measured by several different factors, and a positive self esteem is essential to reaching those goals that define success. One of the first things someone must do in order to progress upward and onward, is to learn how to improve his/her self esteem and then use that knowledge to make things happen for the better. Folks with a good self image and lots of positive self esteem go farther and faster than those that are held back by fear, insecurity, and feelings of ineptness or inability to perform because those folks see themselves as losers rather than winners. - 30535

About the Author:

Eve Francis writes on topics such as Self Esteem Tests. For more information on Self Esteem The Off Spring visit our site.

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Relationship Rescue

Many people begin searching for relationship rescue tactics to try and bring back the spark they once had with a partner when the magic begins to fade. Over time, most relationships grow and change from the loving, romantic bond into a steady routine of daily rituals and habits. In some cases, those habits can make one or both people in the relationship feel as though theyre being taken for granted.

Some people may find that theyre arguing more often than theyre enjoying each other. Others may find that theres nothing left to say to each other or they simply fall into a daily pattern where everything else seems more important than the relationship.

Your relationship doesnt have to be this way.

Often the first avenue many people try in order to re-kindle a relationship is to try and bring back some of the romance. Intimate dinners and provocative lingerie are nice physical attempts at bringing you closer again, but they dont address on the inner, emotional reasons why the relationship may be strained. On the other hand, endlessly talking about your relationship rescue plans and tactics could potentially drive a wedge between you and strain the relationship even further.

There are plenty of relationship rescue tactics you can use to bring that loving spark back into your relationships. Here are some relationship rescue suggestions you can try to help get you back on the right track.

1. Appreciation
When the initial heady, romantic stage of any relationship begins to settle into a comfortable partnership, many people lose sight of the things they originally appreciated in their partner. They begin to focus on the things that irritate them or annoy them or make them mad.

Unfortunately, focusing on all the negative aspects of your partner can often bring about a feeling of resentment, which can lead to arguments and eventually the destruction of the relationship.
Its important to try and find things in your partner that you appreciate. You might appreciate their kindness or their sense of humor or their intelligence or whatever attribute attracted you to them in the first place.

2. Awareness
Live each day of your relationship as though it was the last day you have with your partner. Accidents happen when we least expect them. While this doesnt mean its going to happen to you, consider how youd feel if something did happen and today really was the final day you had together.

What would you regret most? What would you wish youd said or done or changed if you never had the opportunity to do them again?

Your answers to those questions should be the very same things you need to be doing with your partner each and every day. When you live each day as though it was your last, the romance will return almost immediately.

3. Communication
Your partner cant read your mind. Sitting in silence letting a problem brew until youre at bursting point wont make your partner see problems any more clearly and it can compound the negative emotions within you.
Its important to communicate with your partner about your expectations, your needs, your goals and ambitions, your disappointment and anger. Communication is about letting the other person know what youre feeling in a clear, non-blaming manner so that you can both be sure youre on the same page.

Relationship rescue is all about finding ways to be sure you understand and appreciate the little things you do for each other instead of focusing on the negatives. If you can communicate clearly and find ways to appreciate and support your partner, then your relationship rescue attempts will be rewarded.
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