Showing posts with label dumped. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dumped. Show all posts

Saturday, May 28, 2016

My Boyfriend Dumped Me Picking Myself Back Up

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“I feel like dying because my boyfriend dumped me!” It isnt the end of the world and it isnt even close. Even though it hurts, it isnt going to kill you. This is something that you can and will get over. It will take some work, some help, some readjusting in the way you think, and some time. Be sure that just because you are upset that “my boyfriend dumped me” doesnt mean that life stops, life goes on. Be ready for it.

Getting past the idea that “my boyfriend dumped me” isnt going to be easy but it also isnt going to be impossible. You are going to have to pick yourself up and dust yourself off and move along. The alternative means that you will be stuck wallowing in your own misery. If that is no life that you want to have then do what it takes to get out of it. It takes work to climb back out of the pit but the work is worth it.

Dont be afraid to ask for help but be careful where it is that you ask for it. If you are battling depression because of it, seek professional help. This doesnt mean that you are going crazy, depression is something that many people deal with so dont worry about people judging you. Do try to beat it, though.

It may be, though, that you have good friends or family that can help you out while you are trying to deal with that fact that “my boyfriend dumped me.” Be careful to not lay too much on these people, though, and when you ask for advice, follow it. If you are constantly complaining about your life and the situation but arent following up on what advice is given, they are going to reach a point that you dont want. They are going to get tired of you and cut you off or seriously consider it.

You should also re-frame the way you look at the situation. Try looking at it from a different angle or perspective. While you may see it as the end of the world, from another persons perspective, it may not be. Try to find that other persons perspective. Try to see what good it is that you have to offer someone. What are your best qualities? For sure there is going to be someone out there who will appreciate them. Wait for them to come along.

While you are waiting, find some way to improve yourself. Find something that you have long dreamed about doing and throw your life into it. If there is something non-romantic that you have longed to achieve in life, pursue it. Do you want to make yourself better in anyway, now is the time to do it. Try to find someway to use this time and that negative energy you have and do something positive with it.

The end result will be a happier you. Once you have found that happiness, it will become magnetic and draw in the person that you dream of, the one that makes you smile and makes you feel like you belong. It will make you look back on this dark time in your life when you were crying because “my boyfriend dumped me” and see it as one of the best things that ever happened to you.
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Tuesday, May 24, 2016

My Boyfriend Dumped Me What To Do Next

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If youre thinking, "My boyfriend dumped me. Now what do I do?" youre not alone. Millions of people have been in the same position you are right now. Things do get better, whether you get back together with your boyfriend or not. But if youre despairing, "My boyfriend dumped me!" then you need to have a good cry and then get yourself together.

You probably want to get your ex back. While there are no guarantees that youll be able to get back together, there are some things you can do that will help. The first thing is to realize that people get dumped every day for a number of different reasons. And the one you think caused your breakup might not be the real reason.

You have stop assuming and stop telling people, "My boyfriend dumped me because of—“, fill in the blank, if youre not exactly sure thats why he dumped you. How do you know for sure why you were dumped? You have to ask, if you really want to know.

Be sure and only ask if you think you can take the truth, though. If asking could cause him to tell you something that youve suspected but have been in denial about, for instance, will it cause you more pain to find out than to not know? Maybe you should just let the past stay there, and work on the future, in that case.
But if you need to know—and you might if you really want to work things out—then youll have to ask. Try not arguing with the answer you get when you ask. Just accept that "my boyfriend dumped me because of this," and move on.

The next step is to simply ask if he thinks theres a chance. If the reason he broke up with you is something you believe you can fix, then you should make that clear to him. Let him know youre willing to work on these things because you believe that you have something special and you want to make it work
It might really be hard to do these things. Being dumped hurts. But if you want to get back together and make your relationship work, then there has to be honest communication going on between you. And the worst thing that can happen is that things arent going to work out.

If thats the case and theres no chance of you getting back together despite any efforts you might put forth, then at least you made the effort and probably learned something about yourself.

Examine the reasons he broke up with you and you might decide that its not really a bad thing. Even if you know youre better off, it feels crummy to get dumped. Be nice to yourself and treat yourself to a facial or a pedicure.

And try to remember that "My boyfriend dumped me!" is something that many others have had to deal with, and they made things work out, so you can too.
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Monday, April 25, 2016

Stop My Divorce

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Divorces are at an all time high.  Sometimes it seems that it’s easier to get a divorce than to get married. 
People get hurt in divorce.  The parties are forever scarred.  Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt.  Knowing this, you may be wondering “How do I stop my divorce?”
There are three steps to stopping a divorce. 
The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you’ve changed does not mean you really have changed.  If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it’s not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.
If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways.  It is not enough to tell your partner that you’re not stepping out anymore.  You will have to take concrete actions.  As an example, you may need to allow your partner to “monitor” your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis.  If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.
Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship.  For instance, if the wife’s spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance.  If the husband’s work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what.  At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life?  If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes.  But don’t just give lip service to them.  Actions speak louder than words.
The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce.  Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage.  Telling your partner, “but I love you” in the heat of an argument will not win you any points.  When you say “I love you” at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say “I love you, BUT…”  this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.
Use the powerful “I love you” message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument. 
You can’t use logic or guilt to change your partner’s mind.  Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument.  If you feel you must win, then you will lose.  
Finally, don’t think that you can win an argument.  Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to “prove” they are right and their partner is wrong.  This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it’s sure to fail.  Instead of arguing, solve the problem.  If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back. 
Are you wondering how to “stop my divorce?”  Start by following the “stop my divorce” advice I’ve laid out in this article.
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Thursday, April 14, 2016

PULL It Together Help Save Marriage

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Those who want help save marriage from ending in divorce need to PULL it together. It is a hard thing to watch a marriage that was once so precious and important fall apart. Its heart breaking to sit by as the two of you start going your separate ways. If you dont want that to happen then do something about it. Pull it together to help save marriage.

Chill out:
Take a moment to catch your breath and step back from the situation. Not necessarily take a break from it but to just calm down. It is easy for things to get over-heated. Take a moment to catch your breath and give it a moment to cool off. When you were young you were probably told to count to 10 when you got angry so that you could give yourself a chance to get yourself under control.

The same principle applies here. Before you do anything else, take a breath. The next time something is said to you that makes you mad, calm down, get a hold of yourself and then let go of your anger. Only then can you truly learn how to communicate and take the next step to help save marriage.

Understand what is happening:
While you are “chilling out” and taking a moment to breathe, take a look at what is happening. This is where you try and look at the big picture and then look at things from other perspectives. From where you are standing at the moment things may look pretty bad. Try to look at it from other perspectives and it might not be as bad as you thought.

Try looking at it from an outsiders perspective and from the one you love. From those other perspectives you might find out why things have been getting out of control. There may be a relatively simple solution to help save marriage.

Laugh at yourselves:
This doesnt mean to make light of the situation but it does mean dont take yourselves so seriously. It is easy to make mountains out of mole hills. Things snowball out of control but when you are able to see what it was that actually made the snowball you may end up laughing at it.

It can be hilarious to find out how a minuscule  thing can turn into something so huge when it didnt have to. It can be hilarious if you are willing to let it be. Many times when people go through a rough time they will say, “Sometime we are going to look back at this and laugh!” Why wait?

Look for ways to improve:
Once you have had a chance to step back and catch your breath and then been able to get some perspective on the situation, you can move on. When you have realized that at its root, this situation or problems that you have been struggling with is really small and manageable you can get things on track.

The next thing that you need to do is commit yourself to finding a way to improve. If you are responsible for the little things that get blown out of proportion, then try stopping it. If you have learned that you overreact, then stop it. Improve the way you handle situations and everything else may just fall into place to help save marriage.

To help save marriage, PULL together and bring back what belongs together...the two of you.
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Saturday, April 9, 2016

Please Help Me Get My Ex Girlfriend Back

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How many times do men ask their friends how do I get my ex girlfriend back?  Honestly, I thought it was a womans prerogative to change her mind.  Some men just dont know when they are onto a good thing and their reasons for ending relationships border on the ridiculous.

My male friends have finished with girls for:
1) wearing the wrong type of shoes!
2) Her mother
3) The new barmaid at his favorite bar smiled at him.

Now ok I know that a pretty face can turn any mans head and there is the dreaded notion that a woman may turn into her mother but come on guys - the wrong type of shoes?  If women didnt date men because of the clothes they were wearing the human race would have died out long ago.  Behind every well dressed man is a good woman- in early life his mother and later his wife!

I always tell my men friends that they need to make a list before they break up with their partners.  On one side of the list, you put her good points.  Do you find her interesting? Does she look after you?  Does she cook for you?  Does she laugh at your jokes?  Are you attracted to her?

On the other side of the list, they can put the things that wind them up.  Ok she may nag at little too much but then if you put the toilet seat down she might stop.  She may not want more than a cuddle every evening but five times a week doesnt mean that she isnt caring enough.

Writing the good and bad points of your life together down on paper may seem like a cold approach but it is a very practical way of seeing what a great relationship you do/did have. You need to compare the two lists and decide if you should be breaking up with this woman. If you are doing it after the event, it also helps to clarify if you made the right decision to finish the relationship. Sometimes we regret breaking up as we end up feeling lonely.  But loneliness is not a reason to get back together.

If you have dumped the lady in your life but now know it was the wrong decision you need to act fast.  Great life partners do not grow on trees.  She has shown that she will put up with you in all your glory - how many women would be mad enough to do that? 

Take a leaf out Richard Geres book and put some romance back into her life.  Send her flowers - not a bunch of red roses but some of her favorites.  Send her a handwritten letter telling her how much you love her and miss her.  Book her favorite restaurant and treat her to a night out.  In short, you need to treat her just like the princess you believe her to be and assuming you are not a complete disgrace, you wont have ask how to get my ex girlfriend back.
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Tuesday, March 22, 2016

I Miss My Ex Boyfriend

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After you break up with a guy, there is a period of loneliness.  Not only are you missing the time that you spent with him, but there is also a piece of your heart that walked out the door when he did.  If you are saying “I miss my ex boyfriend,” here are some ways to get past the feeling.
There are two steps to getting over an ex.  The first is to bring closure to the relationship and the second is to start on the next phase of your life.
Closure is the psychological term for ending a phase of one’s life.  There are many things you can do to stop saying “I miss my ex boyfriend.”
First of all, you should determine that he doesn’t want you back.  As long as you think that there is a chance you can get back together, you will not begin to heal. 
To that end, exchange all of the physical possessions you have.  Don’t keep his toothbrush in your bathroom or hold on to his leather jacket.  If you have left clothes or other possessions at his house, pick them up. 
If either of you owes the other money, pay it back as soon as possible. 
Don’t contact him and don’t let him contact you.  Perhaps you can be friends in the future, but right now, you need time to separate your emotional lives.  If you give in and answer his phone calls, emails, or texts, you are just letting a wound fester.
If you find yourself saying “I miss my ex boyfriend,” sit down and write about it.  Write a letter to him sharing your feelings about the relationship and the break up.  But don’t send it to him.  Throw it away, or even better, burn it.  This will help you bring closure to the relationship.
After you’ve gotten over the initial hurt of the break up, start putting yourself out there again.  It might feel awkward at first, but you are going to have to face life as a single person sometime.  The sooner you get back on the scene, the sooner you will meet someone new.
If your ex took up a big part of your life, you will want to find new past times.  This may mean reconnecting with your girlfriends.  Or, it may mean going out and finding new friends.
One of the best ways to fill the space an old boyfriend took up is to start something new.  Join a class or a co-ed sports team.  See if your local book store has a monthly book club.  Start going to church again. 
While it may be hard to get started on the social scene again, you will find that you miss your ex boyfriend much less when you are engaged in activities you enjoy.
When you have the opportunity to, start dating again.  Even if the first guy isn’t someone you can see spending the rest of your life with, accept his invitation to dinner or the movies.  As you get back into the routine of dating, you will be able to find a man who can appreciate and love you.
Whenever you hear yourself thinking “I miss my ex boyfriend,” do something that either brings closure to the relationship or propels you to move forward in your life.
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